Why Santa Claus Pisses Me Off - Twice!

No one ever tells you Santa Claus has a raven called Hugin and another called Munin, or that he rides a eight-legged horse called Sleipneir. Or that he originates in Scandinavia, not so much as lives at the North Pole, and that at one of his residences, Gladsheim, he has at his beck and call twelve judges called the Diar, who are not in the least bit concerned whether you've been good or bad this year.

Odin Allfather, Wotan, The Wanderer, is just one myth co-opted by, and rolled into, the legend of Santa Claus. The eight-legged horse may have become an eight reindeer sleigh, and Gladsheim may have become Santa's workshop and factory of happiness... but that is neither here nor there.

An economy has grown around this legend, one that slathers the entire world in red and green ever December, and that seems designed to keep retailers merry and their registers a-jingling; but that is not my problem with Santa. I'm happy to ignore the blatant consumerism that has in turn co-opted the Santa legend in modern times. (If they didn't have Santa they'd invent another mascot). No, my problem with Santa is two-fold:

I see Santa Claus as an enemy - The Enemy - of myth. And I see him also as an enemy of Reason. And yes, I do have an explanation...

The Phantom Menace of Middle-Earth?

I don't remember The Hobbit (the book) as well as I do The Lord of the Rings. I have read it only once, several years ago, and at a breakneck pace (as filler, almost) during my first reading of The Silmarillion. LOTR and the overall Tolkein lore I have read/ mined a lot over time... Perhaps this is why I was able to watch Peter Jackson's The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey not as an adaptation, but as a prequel to the magnificent LOTR trilogy. And it works!

I loved it, with one or two reservations. I will absolutely watch it again in HFR, having seen it in IMAX 3D. Next week then? Any takers?

"The Phantom Menace" of the LOTR movies this is most definitely NOT. Although... The Phantom Menace would've been an excellent name for this movie, given its attention to Mirkwood :)